I just want to know my hard work has paid off...

As my title says, and I mean it,  I just want to know my hard work has paid off.

I have spent seven and a half years in college. I owe everybody and their brother, and I have nothing to show for it. I owe my super expensive school 1,555 dollars for a class I had to take LAST January. For a degree that I can't even use. Which I don't have because I still owe Union money. I wish I had the money to pay everything off, but right now I can't even find a stable job.

I worked so hard to be a teacher, and all of my friends have taken the tests, passed, and scored big. Now they are successful teachers using their overpriced college education for good. Me, I'm the stand in. Always the stand it, NEVER the real thing. Subbing- stand in for the teacher. Babysitter- Stand in for the parents. Well yeah I'm cool to the kids, but I'm cool because i'm different. It KILLS me to walk into every school and see how the kids aren't even expected to be better. It's like the kids settle.

I don't think that's right. Kids ALWAYS rise to your expectations. Don't tell me they don't. That seriously is one of my biggest pet peeves. Children are REMARKABLE. They are special, and they are the funniest people in the whole wide world. They keep me laughing, and I one day will have a classroom full of laughter, and fun. Where my students will feel like the most important things in the world. Because when we are in my classroom. They are. My kids are smart, they are capable of ANYTHING. So shame on you teachers for thinking less of your students! The "they can't do any better so why keep trying" I don't know who your student is, it's not their fault. It's time to stop the negative attitudes towards your students and start loving them for the person out Lord has made them to be. Am I right?

Try it. Expect less of your students/kids. Then see how long your day is. Expect more, and watch them sore. I promise you, they will ALWAYS rise to your expectations.

Which leads me to my current state of frustration. I want my seven, almost eight, years to mean something. I have expected less of myself for so long that now I am in a crater, not even a ditch! I can't find my way out to save my life. I just want to be in front of my classroom making my kids day. Telling them I love them, watching them understand boring things. I want to be their positive example that they desperately need. Kids don't need words. They need people who will get of their cell phones, away from their computers and spend time with them. I heard a statistic in college that says the average parent spends about 20-30 minutes of quality time PER WEEK with their kids. Now really??? Now think about why students are acting out?

Point made.

I just want my time that I have spent in college to be worth something.